She referred me to a specialist, in hopes that this doctor would have some other treatment ideas.Īfter carefully reviewing ALL my medical history and imaging, she said to me, “We need to remove this tumor and the only way to do so is by hysterectomy. She immediately sent me for imaging, and tests revealed that the tumor had tripled in size in the past year. I went in for a routine annual exam with my family doctor and she was concerned about the increase in abdominal pain and bleeding I was experiencing. Hope and Confidenceįast forward to last year. I was advised to wait this out as well and given medication that would hopefully shrink the tumor and help with the bleeding.īy the way, did I tell you I was only 39? Menopause, really? I could be suffering like this for 10-20 years. This tumor was thought to be benign and was attached in a place that surgery would also prove dangerous. The best hope was that I would go into early menopause and some of the shots they were giving me would slow down the hemorrhaging enough that I wouldn’t bleed to death.ĭuring that time, we found out I also had developed a uterine tumor. All my children had come by c-section (those stories are crazy in and of themselves, by the way) and since I had gone through so many abdominal surgeries and other health issues, no doctor would even consider a hysterectomy to stop the bleeding. The doctors tried new procedures and medications, which all failed. I had surgery after surgery to stop the bleeding, to no avail. But the healing didn’t come during that time and I began to grow weary, physically and emotionally. “If only I could get close enough, He would heal me,” she thought.ĭuring those 18 months, I remember praying for healing and restoration of my body, thinking if only Jesus would heal me. She probably traveled a long distance just to be within sight, hoping that He might be merciful and heal her. She desperately wanted healing from her disorder and knew that the only person who was able to heal her was Jesus. Some of the most grievous passages in scriptures can be found in the Psalms. This Bible verse is from the Psalms, if you are looking for hope in the scriptures, the Psalms is a excellent place to start. Yet this comforting Bible verse for loss tells us that God is close to us when we feel more brokenhearted than ever before. God felt so distant in my pain day after day, as I cried out at Him, “Why?” I spent countless nights crying with my husband, mourning the loss of our child. “The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Psalm 34:18 NIVīut if I am being honest, I didn’t feel God’s closeness that night nor in the months to come. Scripture tells us in Psalms 34:18 (NIV): On Christmas Eve 2014, a night we joyously prepared to celebrate the birth of Our Lord… I was giving birth to my last child, one I would never know. A little one I’d never get to hear cry or watch grow into a beautiful, young woman. I laid on the bathroom floor, crying and screaming in horrible pain while I called out to my husband.Īt that moment, I knew my body was setting things in motion to deliver my ninth sweet baby, Emiliana. After a few minutes up there, the pain became excruciating. I rushed to the bathroom upstairs, having no idea what was happening. I was feeling pretty good, despite being so busy.Īs I was putting the final touches on dinner and waiting for family to arrive, I walked through the kitchen only to be stopped with an unbearable sharp pain, swiftly followed by a gush of blood spilling everywhere onto the floor. What a joyous night! The house was clean, the kids were behaving, and dinner was almost done. I was hurrying around preparing for company coming to celebrate the birth of Jesus. It all started Christmas Eve, 5 years ago. But one loss specifically changed my life forever. You see friends, amid giving birth to 6 kids, I have had to bury 3 more children.Īll 3 losses were tragic and still bring me such sadness, even today. 8 A Little More About Pamela Bible Verses for GriefĮven with that joy, when I stop and reflect on being a mother, my eyes fill with tears and my heart stops a beat.

Bible verse comfort in time of loss